Love From Maria

Growing up my mom always had us set out our outfit for the next day as part of our bedtime routine. I grew up figure skating six days a week - four of those days were mornings and I mean six am mornings. There wasn't much time in the mornings to contemplate which clothes to pack for school. When I got older and finally moved out of my parents' house I stopped setting out my clothes at night. One night my husband had the delight of listening to me talk in my sleep. I was in a panic about something and crying in my sleep, so he asked me what was the matter. "I am late for work and I can't decide what to wear" I answered him through my sleep-crying. The following morning when my husband teasingly retold the nighttime drama I had zero recollection of this apparent nightmare but I did feel a familiar sense of anxiety around choosing my outfit. After that I started setting out my outfits at night again, just like I had done all those years at home.  As a mother my...

About three and a half years ago I became a mother, my son was a few weeks old and I was having the hardest time I've ever had. I felt overwhelmed, anxious, I couldn't sleep and I felt indifferent about my son. I felt afraid to be alone with him, afraid he would start crying and never stop, afraid my life would never be the same and that I would never feel like myself again. Without a doubt I was experiencing Postpartum Depression (PPD) and Anxiety - and I had no idea. I read an article tonight that brought me to tears - a mother, Allison, in Virginia took her life as a result of PPD. She had no outward signs or symptoms. No one close to her had any idea, she didn't even know. My heart is breaking for her family and for her. How do we reduce these deaths? How do we reduce PPD? I'm not really sure what the answers are but much like Allison I had no idea what I was experiencing, nor did the people around me. I felt like something was wrong with me or with my son...

Last week at midnight, a first responder knocked on a woman's door. A neighbour wasn't doing well and their partner was out of town. The first responder explained that they would need to take the neighbour to the hospital, leaving two young children without care. The first responder asked if the woman would care for the children. There was no one else to ask - no family or friends to ask - just this woman. The neighbour and the woman had met briefly a few times. The woman knew the name of the eldest child but as far as specifics go, the name was all she knew. Without hesitation the woman said yes. She woke the young children and explained to the eldest that her mommy had gone to the doctor. She took them to her home, across the street, where she tucked them lovingly into cozy beds and stayed in the room with them all night. In the morning she made them breakfast, her and her husband played with the children as if they were their own grandchildren and when their mother was feel...

Fear. It's one of those trendy-type things now, you know "feel the fear and do it anyway" and all that jazz. It's also one of our most basic states. From a very young age, fear is something we know and a state that our body enters with relatively little stimulus. We enter it in a physiological state - that flight or fight response - and we enter it in a mental state - when we don't understand.  There's a lot I don't understand. The past few weeks have produced several events that I don't understand, that I may never really understand. I'm not writing to convince anyone to take either side. I believe every situation needs to be examined independently of others, in its entirety - all details included. But I would be lying if I said I had little fear in regards to the recent events. I am afraid. And I am confused. And I am saddened. Why are people being judged by the colour of their skin or the profession they choose? Why are so many people being sh...

I often find myself thinking about the society we live in today - how we live, what we do, eat, say, etc. - I always wonder how we ended up here and why. I wonder this even more when I read an article like this one , underlining the damage we are doing to our bodies by living the ways we do now.  I know we are all trying to do our best and I am in no way calling anyone out or trying to criticize any one person's parenting, but we are a collective whole and as a whole we really need to reconsider the choices we are making. In specific, the movement we are, and more often than not, aren't making. I hope you had the time to read the above article, if not, I hope you'll find the time at some point. This information gets me down, I have to be honest, but rather than dwell on the negatives, let's talk about how we can work on this. Incorporate movement into your daily routine. Carve out time to take your kids to the park, for a walk around the neighbourhood or i...

Today I watched as fifty people became Canadians - fifty people, from twenty four different countries. I hope you join me in thinking this is an amazing thing.  Years ago I was lucky enough to help a dear friend study for her citizenship. I'm sure when she asked me that both her and I figured I would be a helpful tutor, being the good Canadian that I am. I'll be honest though, and I remember admitting this to my friend, I didn't know a lot of the answers to the questions on the exam. I was humbled and filled with so much respect for anyone who decides to become a citizen and write our exam. You can imagine my joy when my good friend officially became a Canadian.  Of course I thought about this when watching the fifty new Canadians take their oath this morning. I thought about the time they had spent studying for the exam and the effort they put in to officially joining our country.  Before the ceremony we were asked if we had any advice for the new citizens. I thoug...

I want to tell you a story - it isn't too long, if you have a minute, I hope you'll read it. She's always been a survivor, she's always been strong. Her childhood was not what anyone would label as easy and unfavourable situations at home led her to move out at the age of sixteen. After marrying she bravely moved out west, with her husband, to start something new and leave behind what needed to be left. Her first child came to her easily - a boy - her whole heart wrapped up as a sweet, blond headed baby. He quickly became her everything but like so many, they wanted more children. As it turned out, the second would not come to her so easily. For four years they tried to conceive, experiencing no luck. When the time came that the doctors decided to investigate her troubles with conceiving, their luck had changed - she was pregnant with baby two. Life went on, as it does, and at twenty four weeks pregnant she found herself away with her family of three when sh...